1.) You’re demotivated by fear
When you’re afraid, even if you’re entering territory that you’ve chosen to move into, a part of yourself is determined to avoid going forward. Fear slows you down and makes you hesitant and careful, which can be beneficial to you, but sometimes your fears are based on your imagination rather than an accurate assessment of the risks in your reality. If your fear is big enough, even if you’re also excited to go forward, the part of you that wants to keep you safe can successfully prevent you from going forward into territory that’s both desirable and safe.
Me: Fear of critics and lose of trustworthy from other people. I know people look down upon me, though I am doing well in certain things.
2.) You’re demotivated by setting the wrong goals
Martha Beck has a great model for understanding motivation. She explains that we have an Essential Self and a Social Self. Your Essential Self is the part of you that’s spontaneous and creative and playful, the part that knows what’s most important to you. Your Social Self is the part of you that developed since the day you were born, learning the rules of the tribe and working hard to make sure that you’re safe by making you follow the rules of the tribe.
We’re all surrounded with so many messages that feed into our Social Selves and we’re keen to impress our tribe. When you feel demotivated, it’s because you’re setting goals based purely on what your Social Self wants and this is pulling you away from the direction your Essential Self wants you to take. Your Essential Self uses demotivation to slow you down and try to disinterest you from the toxic goals you’ve set.
Me: I set a perfect goal before until people on the higher authority ruins it. And now, there will be no more goals. Just go with the flow.
3.) You’re demotivated by lack of clarity about what you want
When you haven’t consciously and clearly articulated what you want, your picture of your future will be vague. We like what’s familiar and so we resist what’s unfamiliar and vague and we stay with and re-create what’s familiar to us instead. If you’re not clear about what you want to create, then it makes sense that you’ll lack motivation to act because you’d rather stay with your current familiar reality.
Me: I want to be the best nurse, giving impact to the healthcare setting in this MOH. When the people said you must do this, that, these and those, and no full stop, so I think my passion just gone. I’d choose to stay with current order from the higher authority until when? I’m not sure.
4.) You’re demotivated by a values-conflict
Your values are what are important to you in life. If you have a values conflict it means that there are two or more values that are important to you but you feel that you can’t satisfy all of those values in a particular situation. This causes you to feel conflicted and pulled in different directions as you try to find ways to get what’s important to you. You might have brief spurts of motivation to work on something and then lose motivation and start working on something else or your motivation might dry up altogether because the energy of dealing with internal conflict quickly tires you out and saps your motivation.
Me: I want to be a good nurse. I want to show people that degree nurses aren’t do shit. I did all by myself. But, at last, people don’t recognize me. I am tired of trying my best to gain acknowledgement from people but they are too blind to see. So, what I do now is just do what people want me to do – doing regular nurse jobs and tasks. Nothing extraordinary. See, now you can’t differentiate between the graduate nurses and the current staff nurse. It’s a waste. So sad.
5.) You’re demotivated by lack of autonomy
We thrive on autonomy. We all have a decision-making center in our brains and this part of us needs to be exercised. Studies have found that this decision-making center in the brain is under-developed in people who have depression and that, by practicing using this part of the brain and making decisions, depression often clears.
Me: Before this, I tend to make my own non-idiot-kind-of decision making. Until people said, “You are a nurse. So, just follow orders”. Then some people said, “We know that you are good. But to show off your brightness is a waste. Nobody hears you”. Whenever I voiced out an opinion in order to push the nursing profession towards higher level, people said, “We did research regarding this. And who are you to judge? Before this, none of them says things about this policy. And now you came and wanted to us to change?” The reality is, I just giving an opinion based on what I learned in my former nursing school and what we’d practice in my previous university hospital. They should be glad that I care to share.
6.) You’re demotivated by lack of challenge
When it comes to dealing with challenges, there’s a sweet spot. Too great a challenge and the fear becomes too great and saps our motivation, and if the challenge is too small, we quickly get bored and struggle to stay motivated. We’re designed to be living, growing creatures and we need constant challenge and opportunities to master new skills. Without challenge, our Essential Self steps in and demotivates us as a way of telling us that we’ve departed from the path that’s right for us.
Me: My challenge is the same like other nurses. That is no challenge. So, I have nothing here to proof that I am different from others.
7.) You’re demotivated by grief
At the beginning of any change, we go through a phase of wondering if we should or could hang onto the way things were and grieving what we’d be losing if we make significant changes. Confusion, self-doubt, mistrust of the world around us and feeling lost are common symptoms and the bigger the change, the more powerful these symptoms. Sometimes we even go through a bit of depression and social withdrawal. With all the grieving and fearing and feeling lost that goes on in this phase, it’s normal for your motivation to dry up.
Me: If I said something about the current management and policy, people will keep on criticizing me behind. People will lose trust, and withdraw me from the community. The truth? I will never trust you people!
8.) You’re demotivated by loneliness
This is an especially important one for those of us who work alone from home. You know those days when you feel a bit cabin-feverish, you just don’t feel like working and you’d rather be out having a drink with a friend or playing a game of soccer? Well perhaps it’s because we’re designed to be social creatures and sometimes your Essential Self is just longing for some connection with other people and so it steps in and hi-jacks your work motivation so that you’ll take a break from work and go and spend some time with other people and give your Essential Self what it needs.
Me: I am working with some colleagues and other health care team members, and also not forgetting the managerial persons. They are just not helping. Better to work alone until I feel tired, stress and showing a bitter-sour face. Cute, huh?
9.) You’re demotivated by burn-out
Since I attract over-achieving Type A’s, and as a recovering Type A myself, I know that sometimes we’re banging on about wanting to get more done even after we’ve exceeded the limit on what’s sustainable. If you’re feeling tired all the time, have lost your energy for socializing, and the idea of taking a snooze sounds more compelling than the stuff you’re usually interested in, then you’ve probably pushed yourself too long and hard and you may be burned out.
Me: Undoubtedly, I am a Type A person.
10.) You’re demotivated by not knowing what to do next
Your end-goal might be nice and clear, but if you haven’t taken time to chunk your end-goal down into smaller goals, you’ll get stuck, confused and demotivated when it’s time to take action. Some projects are small and familiar enough that they don’t need a plan, but if you’re often worrying that you don’t know what to do next and you don’t have a clear plan, then this might be the source of your demotivation.
Me: Of course I don’t know what I supposed to do next. Because there are people up there master mind-ing my future, like a chess match. I only have to wait for their orders. It is too bad.
P/S: The dullness of my future is coming. Thank you people! Why nursing profession in this country is so lame?
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| I never say that I hate my job. |
*Currently listening to Whitney Houston - Try It On My Own
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